I'm STILL high off the Northern!

So they say, "all good things must come to an end..." but I am finding that the best things are usually only the beginning!

Saturday, I competed in the NPC Beverly International Northern Kentucky Bodybuilding, Bikini, and Figure Championship!... Bikini division of course.

This has been one of the best experiences of my life. Not only have I found a an amazing core group of people, but I also ran into ME along the way... and I like it.


There were a few lessons learned, as is expected in one's first journey into the unknown.

As you all have been made painfully aware, I have been "dieting" and working out like mad since the last week of December 2010. I was working really hard on getting lean and simultaneously trying to build muscle. I accomplished both of those goals. Go me... I lost about 4% body fat, and gained a couple pounds of muscle, at least.

I decided to enter the bikini division because I needed a motivator to lose the weight after I had Leo. Since April of last year, when I started working out with Joe Daniels, I have lost about 20lbs. That sounds so insane to me! By the time the show came around, I knew I was hopelessly hooked on clean eating and exercises that make my whole body wicked strong... People have been hooked on worse things.

So I got my bod rockin', ordered a suit and heels, and set out to accomplish another crazy goal... Get on stage in front of hundreds of people I don't know, in a bikini... If you know me, you know I don't even go to the pool without shorts on, and I don't take the shorts off until I am sliding into the water. So, overcoming that particular mental hurdle, had me more nervous than any of the rest. This is where I surprised myself, and realized I have a lot to learn about me, and it all started with the coldest spray tan in the history of EVER...

So, I walk in for my tan.. I have followed all written instructions for skin prep and I am ready for the best spray tan in the world. I'm in the tent undressing and I think to myself, "I should probably just be naked for this." Did I really just think that to myself?? Me?... Wow.. Ok, so i rolled with that. So the woman comes around and instructs me on how to stand, then begins to spray freaking brown ICE water on me!!!!!!!! I mean heat that shiz up, for real! WTF makes you think that's ok? Sorry, PTSD kickin' in. Anywho... So when that's over, I am so relieved. Now I can just hang here and dry, so I'll warm up soon. Oh JK, here's a giant fan that's going to blow on you for the duration of your nude stay in our little blue tent here. I'm not mad. They were great ladies, but it was cold.

So, when I leave there I am brown, which I expected, I smell terrible, which I did not expect. When I get home from checking in, I do the smart thing and go straight to sleep. Not a decision I make well often... At 5, I wake up, I "fix" my hair, brush my teeth, put on my sweats, and leave to get my makeup done. At this point, my skin is DARK and my face is really spotty. The color didn't look smooth.. it looked, not great.

So, long story short... Apparently I was supposed to rinse off the next morning. So... lesson learned! I had a really hard time getting my face to look normal. Next time I'll rinse and look like a human. Oh the things that humble us...

So now it's about 8am, and I am scheduled for a touch-up on my tan at 9am. I get through that and then it's the waiting game.. and because of touch-ups, I am playing the waiting game in my sweats sans underwear and bra. Few things are more internally awkward than hanging out talking to men and women you barely know with an unnaturally brown speckled face in full-on commando mode. I got through this too...

So around 12pm, pre-judging for bikini starts-- I got on stage and did my thing (what parts I remembered of said "thing"), and cheesed until my face literally started burning. This is where I really surprised myself. This cheesing wasn't forced... it was actually sort of involuntary. I was just having so much fun, and I was so happy to be there, I just couldn't stop.


I was on stage in a bathing suit with people studying all my nooks and crannies, and I was having fun? It is amazing what I learned about myself when I opened my mind to a new experience...Especially one SOOOO far out of my comfort zone.

Now, in retrospect, I realize how much I've changed as a result of this experience. My journey to enlightenment actually began Friday night when I got my spray tan. I walked right into that tent , got butt naked, and didn't think twice about it.. I don't know if you realize how invasive a butt-naked spray tan can be, but I all but coughed.

Then my journey continued when, after a while, I've realized I didn't actually care that I was commander-in-chief of the United States of I'm Butt-A** Naked under my sweats... ah geez... so lame, I apologize.

Then again when I think about how easily I conversed with other competitors (men and women) about body parts while all parties were minimally clothed. (This may not seem like a big deal, but it's something that would have had me red-faced in the past.)

I walked around that place in my little bikini like it was my mother-effin' living room. I didn't even walk around my real mother-effin' living room in anything less than sweats before this...

I wore 5" heels.

I small talked.

(If you know me personally, you're giggling right now.)

I went on stage in a bikini and was proud of the work I've done.

So what have I learned? Well, A lot.. but my favorite lesson has been this:

The human body is just a shell. I took really good care of my shell. I made it stronger, I fed it good food, I exercised it, I tanned it, and I put it on display. It's almost the equivalent of my brain earning a college degree. Just varying types of exploitation... It's nothing to be ashamed of. I have been so worried with all of these pictures coming out online..

I didn't want people to get the wrong idea about WHY I did it, or HOW I could be ok with those pictures being posted. Truth is... I suppose I don't care much what anyone thinks! I don't mean for that to sound attitudinal. It's just not about anyone else... It's about me.

I set out to accomplish something I thought I could never do. Not only did I have to completely change my lifestyle, re-work my eating habits (stick to my food plan with no exceptions), cook, exercise 6 days a week, constantly challenge myself, and function on a maximum of 4 hours of sleep every day, while also working, keeping the house in order, and being a wife and mama!(Of course it helps that Bran is the most helpful and supportive man I've ever met, so I can't take all the credit!)

This whole thing has been about personal accomplishment from day 1. I never realized how amazing personal growth can be, and I have never felt so satisfied. Not only did I have to overcome REAAAALLY bad habits and train my body A LOT, but I also had to overcome the mental block that left me debilitatingly (not a word) modest. What was I hiding?? Who was I hiding from? I think I overvalued the human shell. And by that, I don't mean it's not valuable. I mean it's just not that big of a deal...

So, what's my next move?? Right now I am taking the rest of this week off. I have a new work schedule I am adjusting to and.... well that's the only excuse I've got. However, Monday I start back on food plan full force and get back to a somewhat normal routine of exercise! I am studying for my license, and really need to focus on that, but depending on where my body is, I may do the Derby April 23. But, I know for sure that I am doing the Souther KY Classic on May 21 in Scottsville.

It's a new show, and it is apparently really small, but... doesn't matter to me because I just need to have a goal and get some more practice under my belt. Between now and then, and just going forward in general, the focus is going to be on building a lot of muscle. So heavier lifting, and more food??... Not quite sure yet.. I'll figure it out and let ya know.

So, if you're still with me, then you're nicer than I am... I would have quit reading this glorified diary entry about 15 minutes ago. But, I do thank you for taking the time!

If you have any questions, post them in the comments or message me directly--as most of you usually do--